Catatan harian si pengembara dalam samsara

2nd Chapter Confession

1. To the Buddhas, those thus gone, and to the sacred Law, immaculate, supreme and rate. And to the Buddha’s offspring, oceans of good qualities, that I might gain this precious attitude, I make a perfect offering.

2. I offer every fruit and flower, and every kind of healing medicine, and all the precious things the world affords, with all pure waters of refreshment.

3. Every mountain, rich and filled with jewels, all sweet and lonely forest groves. The trees of heaven, garlanded with blossom, and branches heavy, laden with their fruit.

4. The performed fragrance of the realms of gods and men; all incense, wishing trees and trees of gems, all crops that grow without the tiller’s care, and every sumptuous object worthy to be offered.

5. Lakes and meres adorned with lotuses, all plaintive with the sweet-voiced cries of water birds, and lovely to the eyes, and all things wild and free, stretching to the boundless limits of the sky.

6. I hold them all before my mind, and to the supreme buddhas, and their heirs will make a perfect gift of them. O, think of me with love, compassionate lords, sacred objects of my prayers, accept these offerings.

7. For I am empty-handed, destitute of merit, I have no other wealth. But you, protectors, you whose thoughts are for the good of others, in your great power, accept this for my sake.

8. The buddhas and their bodhisattva children — I offer them myself throughout my lives. Supreme courageous ones, accept me totally. For with devotion I will be your servant.

9. For if you will accept me, I will be. A benefit to all, and freed from fear. I’ll go beyond the evils of my past, and ever after turn my face from them.

10. A bathing chamber excellently fragrant, with floors of crystal, radiant and clear. With graceful pillars shimmering with gems, all hung about with gleaming canopies of pearls.

11. There the blissful buddhas and their heirs. I’ll bathe with many a precious vase. Abrim with water, sweet and pleasant, all to frequent strains of melody and song.

12. With cloths of unexampled quality, with peerless, perfumed towels I will dry them. And offer splendid scented clothes, well dyed of surpassing excellence.

13. With different garments, light and supple, and a hundred beautiful adornments, I will grace sublime Samantabhadra, Manjughosha, Lokesvara and their kin.

14. And with a sumptuous fragrance that pervades a thousand million worlds, I will anoint the bodies of the buddhas, light and gleaming bright, like pure and burnished gold.

15. I will place before the Buddha, perfect object of my worship. Flowers like the lotus and the mandarawa, Utpala and other scented blossom, worked and twinned in lovely scented garlands.

16. I will offer swelling clouds of incense, whose ambient perfume ravished the mind. And various foods and  every kind of drink, all delicacies worthy of the gods.

17. I will offer precious lamps. All perfectly contrived as golden lotuses. A bed of flower petals scattering. Upon the level, incense-sprinkled ground.

18. I will offer palaces immense and resonant with song. All decked with precious pearls and pendant gems. Gleaming treasures fit to ornament the amplitude of space, all this I offer to the loving bodhisattvas.

19. Precious parasols adorned with golden shafts, and bordered all around with jeweled fringes. Upright, well-proportioned, pleasing to the eye, again all this I give to all the buddhas.

20. May a multitude of other offerings, accompanied by music sweet to hear. Be made in great successive clouds, to soothe the sufferings of living beings.

21. May rains of flowers, every precious thing. Fall down in an unceasing stream. Upon the jewels of sacred Dharma, the Triple Gem and all supports for offering.

22. Just as Manjughosa, gentle and melodious, made offerings to all the conquerors. Likewise I will make oblation, to the Buddhas and their bodhisattva children.

23. I will offer prayers by every way and means. To these vast oceans of good qualities. May clouds of tuneful praise, ascend unceasingly before them.

24. To buddhas of the past, the present and all future time, and to the Doctrine and Sublime Assembly, with bodies many as the grains of dust, upon the ground, I will prostrate and bow.

25. To shrines and all supports, of bodhicitta I bow down: All abbots who transmit the vows, all learned masters, and all noble ones who practice Dharma.

26. Until the essence of enlightenment is reached, I go for refuge to the buddhas, also I take refuge in the Doctrine, And all the host of bodhisattvas.

27. To perfect buddhas and bodhisattvas, in all directions where they may reside, to them who are the sovereigns of great mercy, I press my palms together, praying thus.

28. “In this and all my other lifetimes, wandering in the round without beginning, blindly I have brought forth wickedness, Inciting others to commit the same.”

29. “I have taken pleasure in such evil. Tricked and overmastered by my ignorance. Now I see the blame of it, and in my heart, O great protector, I declare it!”

30. “Whatever I have done against the Triple Gem, Against my parents, teachers, and the rest, through force of my defilements, By the faculties of body, speech, and mind”.

31. “All the evil I, a sinner, have committed. The sin that clings to me through many evil deeds. All the frightful things that I have caused to be, I openly declare to you, the teachers of the world.

32. “Before my evil has been cleansed away, It may be that my death will come to me. And so that, come what may, I might be freed. I pray you, quickly grant me your protection!”

33. The wanton Lord of Death we can’t predict. And life’s tasks done or still to do, we cannot stay. And whether ill or well, we cannot trust. Our lives, our fleeting, momentary lives.

34. And we must pass away, forsaking all. But I, devoid of understanding. Have, for sake of friend and foe alike, provoked and brought about so many evils.

35. My enemies at length will cease to be. My friends, and I myself, will cease to be. And all is likewise destined for destruction.

36. All that I possess and use, is like the fleeting vision of a dream. It fades into the realms of memory, and fading, will be seen no more.

37. And even in the brief course of this present life, so many friends and foes have passed away. Because of whom, the evils I have done, still lie, unbearable, before me.

38. The thought came never to my mind. That I too am a brief and passing thing. And so, through hatred, lust and ignorance. I’ve been the cause of many evils.

39. Never halting, night or day. My life is slipping, slipping by. And nothing that has passed can be regained – And what but death could be my destiny?

40. There I’ll be, prostrate upon my bed. And all around, the ones I know and love – But I alone shall be the one to feel. The cutting of the thread of life.

41. And when the vanguard of the Deadly King has gripped me, what help to me will be my friends or kin? For only goodness gained in life will help me. This, alas, is what I shrugged away.

42. O protectors! I, so little heeding, had hardly guessed at horror such as this – and all for this brief, transient existence, have gathered so much evil to myself.

43. The day they take him to the scaffold, where his body will be torn and butchered. A man is changed, transfigured by his fear: his mouth is dry, his eyes start from his brow.

44. If so it is, then how will be my misery when stricken down, beside myself with fear, I see the fiend, the messenger of Death, who turns on me his hell and dreadful gaze?

45. Who can save me, who can now protect me from this horror, from this frightful dread? And then I’ll search the four directions, seeking help, with panic-stricken eyes.

46. Nowhere help or refuge will be found, and sunk beneath the weight of sorrow. Naked, helpless, unprotected – what, when this befalls me, shall I do?

47. Thus from this day forth I go for refuge to Buddhas, guardians of wandering beings, who labor for the good of all that lives, those mighty ones who scatter every fear.

48. In the Dharma that resides within their hearts, that scatters all the terrors of samsara, and in the multitude of bodhisattva, likewise I will perfectly take refuge.

49. Gripped by dread, beside myself with terror, To Samantabhadra I will give myself, and to Manjushri, the melodious and gentle, I will give myself entirely.

50. To him whose loving deeds are steadfast, O my guardian, Avalokita, I cry out from depths of misery, “Protect me now, the sinner that I am!”

51. Now to noble one, Akashagarbha, and to Kshitigarbha, from my heart I call. And all protectors, great, compassionate, to them I go in search of refuge.

52. And to Vajrapani, holder of the diamond, the very sight of whom will rout. All dangers like the deadly host of Yama, to him indeed I fly for safety.

53. Formerly your words I have trangressed, but now I see these terrors all around. To you indeed I come for help. And pray you, swiftly save me from this fear.

54. For if, alarmed by common ills, I act according to the doctor’s words. What need to speak of when I’m constantly brought low. By lust and all the hundred other torments?

55. And if, by one if these alone, the dwellers in the world are all thrown down, and if no other remedy exists, no other healing elsewhere to be found.

56. Than words of the omniscient physician, uprooting every ill and suffering. The thought to turn on him deaf ears, is raving folly, wretched and contemptible.

57. If along a small and ordinary cliff, I need to pick my way with special care, What need to speak of the immense crevasse, that plunges down, unnumbered fathoms deep?

58. “Today, at least, I shall not die.” So rash to lull myself with words like these! My dissolution and my hour of death will come upon me ineluctably.

59. So why am I so unafraid, for what escape is there for me? Death, my death will certainly come around, so how can I relax in careless ease?

60. Of life’s experience, all seasons past, What’s left to me, what now remains? By clinging to what now is here no more, my teacher’s precepts I have disobeyed.

61. This span of life and all that it contains, my kith and kin are all to be abandoned! I must leave them, setting out alone, what grounds are there for telling friend from foe?

62. And therefore how can I make sure to rid myself of evil, only cause of sorrow? This should be my one concern, my only thought both night and day.

63. Therefore all the sins I have committed, blinded in the dark of ignorance. Actions evil by their nature of the faults of broken vows.

64. Mindful of the suffering to come, I join my palms and ceaselessly prostrate. And all my evils I will now confess directly in the presence of the Buddhas.

65. I pray you, guides and guardians of the world. To take me as I am, a sinful man. And all these actions, evil as they are, I promise I will never do again.

~The Way of the Bodhisattva ~


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